. uh... performers. Whilehe's watching I can turn him on by feeling his garters and hose throughhis pants." Is this dressing-up his idea?" asks Marina...Jodi shakes her head no. "Oh, no. I thought of doing it. He didn't evenwant to wear his stuff. He was afraid that we might get in a trafficaccident and they would see him in his female stuff at the hospital."Both women seem to find this amusing. I can't believe what is going onhere. I am being treated as an object. Marina and Jodi are. I tied my sneakers and headed out the door. Everyday at 2 PM I took my afternoon 2 mile jog and everyday the ladies, including my older next door neighbor Teresa, would watch me. I never made it obvious that I knew but I knew. I had heard some neighbor gossip that she was heavily into black guys. Her husband Claude just couldn’t get it up anymore. They were approaching 60 and her sex life was reduced to eyeballing the outline of my dick in my compression shorts. I couldn’t blame her. Even soft. Main andar gaya toh main dekh kar hairan reh gaya. Mom apne room mein kapde change kar rahi thi. Unka door galti se khula tha thodi. Toh Samar unhe chhup ke kapde badalte dekh raha tha.Maine dekha uska khada ho raha tha kyunki mom apni bra aur panty mein thi. Isse pehle mom aur kapde utarti maine khaansne ki awaaz ki jisse woh ghabra ke waapas aa gaya. Main samajh gaya tha ki usne mom ko jabse dekha hai undergarments mein woh bahut horny ho gaya.Fir kuchh dino baad maine notice kiya ki woh har. You feel bad about cutting, you start to feel worse. And you cut again. And it keeps on going, and going, and going... It’s very hard to explain and incredibly difficult for people to comprehend but hurting yourself is very addictive. I have no idea why but that’s the only word that I can find to at least try to explain. People often mistake is as a suicide attempt but that’s just because the most common place to cut is arms. It’s not about dying, it really isn’t. It can be a cry for.
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